A History of Idiosyncratic Events in Football – Part Four

--------------Kings Of The Drop--------------

There is nothing worse for a professional footballer (injury excluded) than relegation, unless of course, it's more relegation.

Carlton Palmer, perhaps surprisingly for a player who otherwise had a relatively distinguished playing career, which included eighteen full England caps - is right up there with the 'Kings Of The Drop,' having gone down five times with West Brom (1985/86), Sheffield Wednesday (1989/90), Nottingham Forest (1998/99), Coventry (2001/02) and Stockport County (2002/03).

Neil Redfearn can also write the names of five relegated employers on his 'Curriculum Vitae.'
Bolton (1982/83), Lincoln (1985/86), Barnsley (1997/98), Charlton (1998/99) and Halifax (2001/02).
Redfearn's playing career spanned over twenty years and he played for 13 different league clubs. Redfearn is currently fifth in the all-time list of most Football League appearances. His last league appearance for Rochdale in 2004 took his total to 790.

Perhaps the biggest 'Jonah' of them all is poor Simeon Hodson, (below right) who managed to taste relegation three times before his 21st birthday!

In all Hodson has been involved in teams relegated from the top five levels of the English football league system.

Notts County (1983/84) relegated from the old First Division, Lincoln (1985/86) relegated from the Third Divsion, Lincoln again (1986/87) relegated from the Fourth Division.
In 1990/91 he was part of the West Bromwich Albion team relegated from the Second Division.

In 1992/93 he was a member of the Mansfield Town team relegated from the Second Division also, which following the inception of the FA Premier League, was now the third level of the league system.

It is worth noting that, though he left before the season's end, he played for Notts County in the 1984/85 season when they went on to be relegated from the Second Division. Consequently, his first four seasons saw him involved with clubs relegated from the top four levels in order. Incredibly, his fifth season (1987/88) saw him initially at Newport County (but he left two months before their demise to join West Brom), as they went on to be relegated from the Fourth Division.
That makes five relegations and one near miss in a League career of just ten seasons.

To cap it all off, in 1999/2000 he was relegated from the Football Conference with Altrincham.......to complete the set!

Thus, he can claim to have been relegated from the top five levels of the English football league system with five different clubs.

In 2001, aged 35, a knee injury forced Hodson to retire. He is now a PCSO for the Warwickshire Police.

After-Dinner Sports Tales - Chris Kamara

Here is my is my first of 2010 but my sixth installment so far on the subject of light hearted after-dinner sporting tales, as told by current or ex-professional sportsman.

In previous articles on the subject of 'After-Dinner Sports Tales,' I have chosen humorous anecdotes as told by the likes of Rodney Marsh Gareth Southgate and Chris Coleman from the world of football, Phil Tufnell from cricket, and rugby union's Wade Dooley.

Today I have chosen another former footballer, but one who despite having retired from the game in 1998, can still be seen on a Saturday afternoon......but on your TV screens, usually as a Sky Sports TV reporter/analyst - the one and only, the charismatic Chris Kamara.

Chris Kamara was born in Middlesbrough on Christmas Day in 1957. After serving with the British Royal Navy he joined Portsmouth in 1975, beginning a professional footballing career that saw him move between nine clubs, scoring 71 goals in 641 league appearances. He was also manager of Bradford City and Stoke City before retiring from the game.

Here is an amusing excerpt from a speech made by Chris at a sporting dinner.

"I enjoyed a long career as a football player, signing for Portsmouth (twice), Swindon (twice), Brentford, Stoke, Leeds, Luton, Middlesbrough, Sheffield Utd and Bradford. I then made the transition into management, the highlight being taking Bradford into the First Division via a Wembley play-off final.

I became somewhat of an unlucky mascot to several teams during my playing days. In early 1992, I played my last game for Leeds, which took them to the top of the table. Manager Howard Wilkinson wanted to make sure they stayed there - so he sold me to Luton the very next day! Sure enough, Leeds won the Championship, without me.

David Pleat, the Luton boss, signed me to change things. Luton had been in the top division for ten years - the old First Division, now the Premier League. I certainly did help to change things - Luton were relegated!

I then went to my hometown club Middlesbrough, signing for Lennie Lawrence. It was their first season in the Premier League, and even though Lennie had previously saved Charlton from going down for five years in the late 80's and early 90's, without me, I was a part of the Middlesbrough team he managed that were relegated in the inaugural Premier League season in 1992-93!

Then there was the greatest escapologist since Harry Houdini - Dave 'Harry' Bassett, manager of Sheffield United. He was the boss who could get out of anything. But in the 1993-94 season he signed me, the fateful unlucky mascot - you've probably guessed it by now - Sheffield United went down.

During this period struggling Coventry City were actually paying teams to sign me!"

Classic Football Quotations said by Football Fans or made about Football Fans - Part Two

It'll be a good day for the burglars and one one when the sheep will be left in peace - DICK CAMPBELL, Brechin City manager, on the exodus of fans from the city (population 10,000) to Rangers for a Scottish Cup tie, 2001.

To celebrate Arsenal's defeat in Europe, 10 per cent off everything - ADVERT by the food retailer 'World of Kosher' in the Jewish Chronicle, 2004.

The fans all had the the complexion and body scent of a cheese and onion crisp, and the eyes of pit-bulls - MARTIN AMIS, novelist, reviewing a book on football hooliganism, 1991.

A policeman called me at home. Friday night again. He'd caught a dozen courting couples in the stand and asked me what to do with them. I told him to fix the bloody fence and board 'em in. Best gate of the season it would have been - FRED WESTGARTH, Hartlepool's manager, 1957.

We don't need Viagra to stay up - BANNER by Charlton fans, a month before their team were relegated, 1999.

I always answer letters from supporters. It's death threats I object to - REG BURR, Millwall chairman, 1990.

Even the hooligans had a good time and enjoyed the party. Maybe the cannabis relaxed them - JOHAN BEELAN, Dutch police chief, on the behaviour of England fans in Eindhoven, 2000.

The English stick their psychos in Broadmoor, while the Welsh put theirs in Ninian Park - FULHAM FANZINE, There's only one F in Fulham, awarding Cardiff supporters 0 out of 10 in their 'Best Fan' poll, 1995.

I expect abuse, but I also got a hamburger and about £4.50 in change - GARY NEVILLE, Manchester United captain, on objects thrown at him by Liverpool fans at Anfield, 2006.

Will the owner of a horse attached to a rag-and-bone cart in the visitors' car park return to his vehicle immediately - ANNOUNCEMENT at Cardiff City when West Ham were the visitors, 2004.

He told me I was a dead man and that I wouldn't get out of The Den alive. Then he said I was fat. I said: 'Have you looked at yourself lately?' - KEVIN PRESSMAN, Sheffield Wednesday goalkeeper, on being confronted by a pitch invader at Millwall, 1995.

Are you Tamworth in disguise? - SONG by Burton Albion fans as Manchester United were held 0-0 in the FA Cup against the non-league side, 2006.


To see more classic quotations made by Fans, Managers, Chairmen and Players alike posted on this site previously, type Quotations into the search box in the top left hand corner of the page).

Charlton Pathetic FC

With the upcoming fixture against 'The SE7 Clowns' I could not help but notice the enormous amount of discussion and debate that this particular game has created!
Some of the banter posted especially on the holmesdale.net messageboard has been both highly entertaining and amusing.
This is by no means an attempt to deviate away from the importance of the fixture itself, in terms of the potential end of season prize that is at stake......for both clubs.
In fact it just emphasises the passion, feeling and anticipation that this game radiates.

One of the topics of discussion on the messageboard in the last week or so has included an attempt by Palace fans to create a new song to sing on matchdays.
The result was:

To the tune of head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes.

Hill, Hudson, Hills & Halls, Hills & Halls,
Hill, Hudson, Hills & Halls, Hills & Halls,
I...fill, Watson, Clint & Soares,
Hill, Hudson, Hills & Halls, Hills & Halls.


Finally to end this short post I have selected my Top Ten song titles that I feel best encapsulates the club and fans of Charlton Pathetic.
If you have an apt song title to add to my list, please do post it on this site.


Top Ten:


1/ 'Valley Of The Ignorant' by Pig - 1997

2/ 'Gypsies, Tramps And Thieves' by Cher - 1971

3/ 'Aint Gonna Wash For A Week' by The Brook Brothers - 1961

4/ 'My Life As A Circus Clown' by Matthew Good Band - 2002

5/ 'Welcome To The Cheap Seats' by Wonder Stuff - 1992

6/ 'Camping Next To Water' by Badly Drawn Boy - 2000

7/ 'Why's Everybody Always Pickin' On Me?' by Bloodhound Gang - 1997

8/ 'Sneaking Out The Back Door' by Matt Bianco - 1984

9/ 'Family Affair' by Mary J Blige - 2001

10/ 'Can You Please Crawl Out Your Window' by Bob Dylan - 1966